Assertion
by smellslikechidna
Summary: There's a power-struggle in the Oak household. Shigeru doesn't want it any more. Saka, yaoi, Satoshi-torture in the most scrumptious of ways.


An attempt at Rivalshipping, and a slight dash of League for good measure. 

And Saka. What? You expected less from Kaz?

Theme song: "Want You Bad" – The Offspring (or is it just Offspring?)

For dana-chan. 

She has more than 5x the amount of fics than me. I'm jealous of her spare time. ^_^

Whoop!

♥_Assertion_♥__

          **"Poor Hirokun,"** Kasumi said comfortingly, hugging the sandy-haired Trainer warmly and dragging him into the living room, where Satoshi was currently sprawled on a couch in an old pair of boxers watching replays of the Whirl Cup. He turned his brown eyes lazily towards the pair, saw Hiroshi and blanched. **"Satoshibaka, go make yourself decent!" **she ordered, thwacking her fiancé with a scatter cushion and snatching the empty cola can from the floor. **"Ike!"** she yelled, and, grumbling, Satoshi pulled himself up, nodded to Hiroshi and started up the stairs. She brushed the couch off and shoved Hiroshi down. **"So, what did he say?"** she asked, concerned, sitting next to him.

          Hiroshi pulled a face. **"Shigeru… Shigeru thinks that we need a break."** he mumbled, tugging at his fringe, almost embarrassed. 

          **"What?!"** Kasumi shrieked, outraged. **"Why the hell did he say that?!"**

          Hiroshi cowered against his cushion. **"Because I'm 'too passive', and he was tired of always being on top."** he said shyly, trying to avoid where Kasumi was angrily making threatening and violent words against Shigeru. **"But that's okay, though, Kasumi, cos there's always someone else out there, right? Plenty of fish in the sea… I guess…"**

**            "I'm going to kill him," **Kasumi was muttering. **"And you're getting back together, Hiroshi, so help me God."**

          Hiroshi didn't look too hopeful. **"Demo… Kasumi, he wanted me to take more control… I can't do that…"** he said bashfully, cheeks ablaze and he focused his eyes on where Pikachuu was asleep on the rug. Kasumi glared.

          **"Don't be so damned negative! You can do anything if you try hard enough!"**

**            "I did try! But… y'know…"**

**            "You chickened out."** Kasumi stated matter-of-factly. Hiroshi nodded meekly. **"Hirokun, you need to get a backbone."**

          **"It's not that! When we fought, I could stand up to him easy! It's just… y'know… that kind of stuff."** Hiroshi's cheeks turned a bright red and he hid behind the cushion he was picking the corners on. Kasumi nodded sagely, as though she had all the wisdom of love and romance.

          **"Ah. Then, Hirokun, you need to be taught well in the arts of seduction."** she said wisely, imitating Takeshi impressively, nodding in agreement with herself and watching Hiroshi's normally friendly face pale just ever-so-slightly.

          **"D-demo, Kasumi… I don't mean to be rude, but… you're a girl."** He shook his head. **"If I have to… seduce… _Geru_, then… shouldn't I practise on a guy?"**

          She nodded. **"Of course you should. And you are. Don't worry, he does anything I say or he gets none."** Hiroshi followed her gaze to where Satoshi was thumping his way down the stairs, and reappeared in the living room, dressed in a pair of old jeans and a white t-shirt. 

          **"What?"** he asked, suddenly unnerved at the look Kasumi was giving him, and then when she left Hiroshi, slinked across the room and wound her arms around his neck, pouting at him. 

          Giggling, she winked slyly at Hiroshi. **"Ano… Satochan, can I talk to you in the hallway for a minute?" **she all-but-purred, before pulling him backwards out of the living room. Satoshi closed the door behind him, and Hiroshi found himself staring at the muted television watching some random girl order her Chikorita to waste an Upaa with Vine Whip. He could hear Kasumi and Satoshi whispering in a heated discussion outside, and a tap was dripping steadily in the kitchen. And about two minutes later…

          **"NO!"** Satoshi's yell reverberated half way through Masara.

          And then Kasumi began to whine. **"Oh, Satochan! Onegai?"**

          **"No way."**

          **"But Satoooo!"**

          **"Kasumi, I said no. I don't care _who_ it is, I'm not doing it."**

**            "But you guys wouldn't _have_ to do it!"**

          There was an embarrassed pause.

          **"I DON'T MEAN DOING IT LIKE THAT!"** yelled Satoshi. **"Sumi, I said no and I _mean_ no."**

**            "But-"**

**            "No."**

**            "Please?"  
            "No."**

**            "If you do, I'll-"** There was silence, and Hiroshi assumed that Kasumi was whispering something to Satoshi, who promptly gave a goofy sort of chuckle.

          **"Ehe… really?"**

**            "Uh-huh."**

**            "Well… when you put it that way… NO."**

          **"Dammit, Satoshi!"** And she whacked him through the door with her mallet. **"You always make things difficult."**

^_^

          **"Satoshi, stop being such a child."** Kasumi scolded, before walking back over to him for the fiftieth time, taking Satoshi's hands from behind his back and putting one of them on Hiroshi's thigh, who shot an apologetic look at Satoshi, who gave him a filthy look in return. **"Alright, Hiroshi, if Satoshi is Shigeru-"**

**            "Charming."** Satoshi snorted.

          Kasumi glared at him. **"As I was saying, imagine that my _dense_ fiancé is Shigeru, okay?"**

          **"Okay…"**

          Satoshi growled in his throat and sat on his hands sulkily. **"Satoshi!"** Kasumi growled, stamping her foot into the carpet, scaring Hiroshi while earning Satoshi rolling his eyes. **"You promised you'd help Hirokun!"**

          **"_I _didn't promise anything – you beat me up!"**

          With a hand on her hip, Kasumi looked quite imposing. To Hiroshi, who cowered into the seat and unconsciously grabbed onto his foot protectively. Satoshi just folded his arms, stood up and looked ready for a fight. **"But you said you'd help out!"**

**            "Exactly! Help out! That didn't mean I wanted you sticking my hand on his crotch!"**

**            "Your hand was nowhere near his crotch!"** she yelled back. **"As if I'd do that!"**

**            "Ano…"** Hiroshi tried to interrupt, but Satoshi interrupted his interruption. 

          **"You just _did_!"**

**            "Um… Kasumi-"**

**            "Aren't you the one who says that he'd do anything for his friends? _No matter what_?!"**

**            "Demo… guys?"**

**            "I—but… dammit, that's not the point!"** spluttered Satoshi, his face blood-flushed with anger and excitement from the short argument, and he flopped back down onto the couch exhaustedly. 

          Kasumi nodded in satisfaction. **"Hiroshi, sit on his lap."** she ordered, flicking her hand in the right direction. **"And hurry up! Satochan, if you keep glaring at me like that, I mean it. You'll be sleeping on the couch."**

          Satoshi gave a sulky pout; Hiroshi meekly perched himself on the very edge of Satoshi's knees, shooting him apologetic glances. Though he couldn't really be sorry… once Kasumi set her mind to something, you either went along willingly or got 'coerced' into it. Kasumi marched over to the pair, shoved Hiroshi backwards so that he was crushed against Satoshi's chest, then arranged Satoshi's protesting hands; one around Hiroshi's shoulders, one around his waist. And then, to complete the cute little picture, she made Hiroshi lay his head on Satoshi's shoulder.

          Oh, if only she had a camera… Damn Tooru for breaking his own.

Satoshi frowned from his position on the couch, still with his arms around Hiroshi and Hiroshi cautiously rubbing his cheek against Satoshi's shoulder. **"I'm not kissing you,"** he told him, still frowning when he heard Kasumi tsk disapprovingly. **"Sumiiii. Why can't you do this?"** he whined, shifting so that he could see his girlfriend behind Hiroshi's slightly messy hair.

Kasumi matched his frown with her own. **"Because I don't have a penis,"** she told him bluntly, folding her arms crossly against her chest and glaring at Satoshi, still glowering behind a now precariously perched Hiroshi, sitting nervously at the edge of Satoshi's lap and now not kitty-rubbing but trying to avoid the daggered glare his unwilling partner was shooting.

Satoshi waved the hand that wasn't somewhere on Hiroshi it definitely shouldn't have been dismissively. **"Ookido Shigeru is camper than a field full of boy scouts - he's more of a girl than you are."** he snapped, glaring pointedly at her chest and ignoring the fact that when he waved his arm he had knocked Hiroshi, and now he was wobbling around frantically on Satoshi's lap with an extreme lack of balance. **"So you can do it."** Satoshi said, and jerked his knees, so that Hiroshi clattered to the floor quite unceremoniously.

Kasumi frowned back at him, also ignoring the pile of Hiroshi that imitated the rug, and this time shooting questioning and threatening glares at Satoshi, who stubbornly folded his arms and looked the other way. It was definitely time for the secret weapon. Before Satoshi had a time to react, she was crawling into his lap with the innocent 'little-girl' look that was patented to drive him nuts.

**"Su-sumi, what are you doing?"** he stuttered, trying to keep his sanity and self-control when she started tracing patterns on his chest and gazed up at him through big, baby blue eyes. 

**"Satochan..."** she whined, though he could have sworn she was purring, **"I thought Hiroshi was your friend..."** she said, grinning as his eyes closed when she scratched him behind his ear with a long, blue-painted nail.

**"Sumiiii"** he whimpered, **"Hirokun _is_ my friend, I just don't want him cuddling me-"** he abruptly stopped when her patterns on his chest dipped to his stomach.

**"Onegai?"** she cooed, **"For me?"**

She blinked innocently at him and pouted sulkily as best she could.

**"I..."** he began, opening his brown eyes in protest when she pulled away, looking at him expectantly and beseechingly. **"I hate you,** **koibito."** he muttered, grimacing at her squeal and subsequent glomp.

Hiroshi took copious notes.

^_^

          Next morning, Satoshi was in a slightly better mood, whistling a tune and a spring in his step. Kasumi was grinning also, and the pair of them were… well, very tactile. Hiroshi was in a slightly foul mood – the spare room was in the middle of Satoshi and Kasumi's room and Pikachuu's room, and the noises that had made his hosts, Pikachuu and Leon very happy had stopped him from sleeping. 

          For most of the night, anyway. Eventually he willed himself to sleep through it.

          Slumped over the kitchen table, Hiroshi barely noticed Satoshi talking to him. **"Ano… Hirokun? Is Leon alright with the same kibble as Pikachuu?"** he asked brightly, clutching a large bag decorated with a dancing Pikachuu and Raichi. 

          **"Mm? Oh… hai, he'll eat anything."** Satoshi nodded and turned to a cupboard and taking out a spare bowl. Pikachuu pulled at a sock he was wearing. **"…nani? You want to share a bowl?"** Pikachuu nodded, entwining her tail with Leon's and blushing girlishly. 

          Hiroshi bit his lip and looked at a mark on the table instead.

          **"Do Papii and Zippo need anything different, or can they just have what Herakuroso and Hinoarashi have?" **Hiroshi waved his hand, and Satoshi took a basket of Pokéballs outside. Hiroshi glared at the mark that kept his attention… if he squinted his eyes… it looked like Shigeru's hair first thing of a morning. Damn you, Shigeru, he thought, but realised that he couldn't think of anything that needed his damning. 

          **"Daijoubu?"** Satoshi asked, making Hiroshi jump, and realize that Satoshi had been standing there for a while, trying to balance three coffee cups while holding the back door open for Kasumi and Koduck with his foot. **"You look exhausted,"** he said, setting one cup in front of his friend and handing another to Kasumi, kissing her cheek. Jealous rage burned in his stomach when Kasumi blushed, and he fought it down.

          **"I… couldn't sleep,"** he said, in a clipped tone and avoiding Satoshi and Kasumi's gaze. Both were blushing. Leon hopped minutely away from Pikachuu, who pulled her tail into her paws. 

          **"Ano… well... you know… traffic in Masara is terrible at night… ehehe…"** Satoshi scratched his head nervously. Kasumi shook her head hopelessly, and beckoned Hiroshi out of the kitchen. 

          **"Hiroshi, we need to talk a minute."**

Puzzled, he followed her, leaving Satoshi to work out the rice-cooker.

^_^

          It was _way_ too quiet. 

          Pikachuu and Leon had gone outside through the Pokéflap ages ago, and now the three humans were eating.

          But not talking. Whenever he and Shigeru ate, Shigeru was always talking, bragging, sticking his chopsticks up his nose, trying to eat with them and then complaining when he got a nosebleed afterwards.

          Still, all he had to do was follow Kasumi's instructions… and if Satoshi was telling the truth - which he usually did – and Shigeru really _was_ a mess, although that came through the hotline from Yukinari to Hanako to Satoshi… then maybe this would work…

Slightly shocked, Satoshi dropped his rice bowl with a clatter. **"Kasumi, I'm trying to eat,"** he told her, shooting significant looks in Hiroshi's direction. Kasumi shot him an innocent look in return.

          **"I don't know _what_ you mean,"** she replied simply, and Satoshi's eyes bugged when her foot dragged up his inside leg and up to his knee. He pulled his legs up tightly against the chair he was on and tangled his feet together defensively, so that he was just out of her reach. As much as he loved her, playing footsie at the table in front of Hiroshi was not on. At the table when no one else was there was an entirely different matter. ^_~

He squeaked as somehow, her foot worked its way up his thigh. **"Sumi!"** he hissed around the vase, so that Hiroshi couldn't hear. **"Quit it!"** he ordered, annoyed and somewhat embarrassed, trying to push her slippered foot from going too far. Frowning, Kasumi stood up abruptly, and stepped back, proving to Satoshi that she was keeping her feet to himself. Inwardly, she grinned wickedly when she watched his jaw hit the floor and, trying to yell, protest and shriek at the same time, he turned slowly to Hiroshi, meekly playing with his fish and hiding his face behind the vase. 

Shyly, Hiroshi turned to Kasumi. **"Ano… am I doing it right?"** he asked, twisting his chopsticks around in his grip shyly and avoiding Satoshi's thunderous gaze, getting more so, because Hiroshi was still trying to play footsie.

Kasumi peeked under the table from where she was standing. **"Little bit higher, Hirokun."**

          Satoshi shot up, caught Kasumi's angry glare, realised that the threat she made last night before they had fallen into sated sleep _would_ be carried out, and meekly sat back down, stretching his legs out to their full extent underneath the table. **"Hirokun, if this doesn't work, I personally will beat Ookido Shigeru into dating you again."** he informed him, and from the look on his face, Hiroshi was positive he was telling the truth.

          **"All you have to do is exactly what I tell you."** Kasumi told him supportively. 

          Hiroshi looked apprehensive. **"Ano… do I just… walk up to him and sit on his lap?"**

          **"That might help."**

**            "B-but… I can't do that!"**

**            "Why not? I did it."**

**            "Eh?"**

**            "She sat on my lap for three days until I kissed her."** Satoshi told him, rubbing his leg unconsciously. **"Said she was tired of me dropping hints and unless I kissed her she wasn't moving."**

          **"But… Shigeru and I are already dating… at least, we _were_…"**

**            "So you sit on his lap until he takes you back." **Kasumi ordered.

          **"But…"**

          Satoshi clamped a hand over his friend's mouth. **"Don't argue with her, Hirokun – she weighs more than she looks!" **And then Satoshi went sailing out of the window, complete with appropriate table-marks on his face. Kasumi set the table down carefully, and nonchalantly wiped her hands on her top. 

          **"You can**** practice**** on**** Kabigon****, né, Hirokun?"**

^_^

          Next morning, the doorbell rang shrilly, cutting through Shigeru's slightly sleepy, mostly depressed disposition, and, Burakki at his heels, he dragged himself down the hallway to the front door.

          **"Pika!"** A yellow blur shot through the tiny, Burakki-sized Pokéflap and glomped his leg.

          **"…Leon?"** Shigeru blinked, and took in the frosted silhouette in the glass of the door. **"Hirokoi…"** he murmured, hands unconsciously reaching for the latch and yanking the door open. He saw Satoshi and Kasumi's blue jeep drive off towards the cliff-top that hung over Masara, and both were waving. And then his grey eyes lit up on the grinning form of his… ex-boyfriend, who glomped him mercilessly, winding his arms around his neck, burying his face into his shoulder and inhaling his scent. **"Hiroshi?" **he asked, his voice tinged with trepidation, gently bringing his hands up and ran his long fingers through Hiroshi's haphazard sandy hair. **"…you better come in."** He dragged Hiroshi inside and kicked the door shut with his heel, avoiding the currently glomping pile of Burakki and Pikachuu play-fighting at the foot of the stairs. **"Ano…"**

**            "Geru-"**

**            "I'm sorry,"** they both said at the same time. Hiroshi giggled slightly, and twisted his foot into the carpet shyly, loving when Shigeru trailed the back of his hand against his cheek. But Hiroshi didn't want Shigeru to be all cooey. And he had no intention whatsoever of losing him again. Even three days was far too long.

          Shigeru let out a tiny squeal of surprise when Hiroshi tackled him into the armchair and began to trace his name's kanji all over Shigeru's stomach. **"Hi- Hirokoi?"** he squeaked, watching Hiroshi with frightened grey eyes as Hiroshi promptly stood up, dragging Shigeru with him, tugging at the nck of his t-shirt, and began to nibble on the tiny part of Shigeru's shoulder-blade and kissing it with his lips, knowing that would always get Shigeru to melt, even when he was angry. **"What…"** he gulped, **"are you doing?"** he asked, knees trembling and rubbing his head against Hiroshi's hand like a cat as Hiroshi played with a long strand of auburn hair. 

          Hiroshi pulled away, doe-blue eyes grinning wickedly at Shigeru's pained expression. **"I'm being assertive, Geruchan."** He said, matter-of-factly, and started to unbutton his shirt, **"Though I bet I could be more so if we went upstairs."** He purred, before entwining Shigeru's long fingers in his own and dragging him out of the room and towards the stairs. Shigeru gave a sly smile. 

          **"Feh, we'll wait and see, né?"** he muttered confidently, though his eyes shone with excitement. Hiroshi grinned eagerly and dragged him quicker.

          **"Oh, and Geruchan?"** he said, just outside _their_ room, blocking the door with his body and watching Shigeru's flushed face intently. Wincing with his depleting self-control, Shigeru met his gaze.

          **"What?"**

          **"I'm on top."**

*^_^*

          [A/N]

          Leon = Sparky/Chuchino

          There ya go, Dana! Promised you it, didn't I?

          Glomps!!!!

          ~Kaz

          xxx


End file.
